Tag Archives: Be Bold

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Say No

4 Tips for evaluating alignment with our goals

Say No

“No is a complete sentence” – Anne Lamott

If we are going to achieve our goals, at times we will be saying no to things that might be fun, interesting or rewarding. The reality is that we simply do not have the capacity to do everything. Furthermore, we would not want to take on everything that comes our way since it may not align with our goals. There comes a time when we just have to say no. So how do we decide what to pursue and what to eliminate or postpone?

No is one of the shortest words in the English language yet it seems to be one of the hardest words to say. Ironically, it’s one of the first words we learned to say. So many things come at us at an ever-increasing pace with so many people demanding our attention it is hard to focus on what we should do. Consequently, we try to do it all. Even when attempting to apply a mental matrix of urgent vs. important, everything seems to fall into urgent and important. We find ourselves trying to please everyone and subordinating our priorities to our spare time, which disappears into exhaustion.

The net result is that our energy goes down and our stress goes up. We expend energy on things that in the end may not drive our personal satisfaction and that alone causes stress. We stress about taking on things that we know are not in alignment with our talents and what we want to accomplish. We see work being done and gain satisfaction from its completion, but not the deep-down gratification satisfaction that comes from achieving something that helps to move us forward. This is why we have goals.

Our goals serve as a filter and a compass to sort out the opportunities that align our action with the direction we planned. As we have the opportunity to start a new activity, our goals provide the guidelines that help us make a good decision for the use of our time. If the opportunity is in alignment with the planned work we had identified in our current goals, then we know that it is an opportunity that will make the best use of our time. If we cannot find alignment between the activity and our goal, then it becomes clear that we should take a pass on the proposed opportunity.

In my book “EXCELLENCE: You CAN Get There From Here!”, I lay out a complete process for developing and managing to goals. It contains both a long-term planning process to determine our direction as well as a short-term planning process to set goals and manage our progress.

This brings us full circle on this topic. If the opportunity is not in alignment with our goals, then we use the shortest sentence in the English language and just say no. This may be a hard thing to do and refusing the opportunity will certainly have an impact on the person providing the opportunity. As smart leaders we know to accomplish our goals, we will have to say no to some of the opportunities, activities and demands from our friends, family and colleagues.

Here are 4 tips for evaluating alignment with our goals:

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Make a Difference

4 Tips for making a difference

Make A Difference

“If you aren’t making a difference in other people’s lives, you shouldn’t be in business. It’s that simple.” – Richard Branson

Do you ever wonder if the fruit of your efforts make a difference? Have you ever felt that you were shouting something of great importance, but nobody was listening? Have you ever been discouraged because you know the solution, but nobody seems to recognize you as an authority? I know I have and I still encounter that feeling on a regular basis.

Many years ago, I was exposed to a simple story that to this day helps me put my expectations in perspective and reminds me why I need to keep going. It helps me keep my perspective even when it seems nobody is listening or I question if what I am doing makes a difference.

The Starfish Story

A young man is walking along the ocean and sees a beach on which thousands and thousands of starfish have washed ashore. Further along he sees an old man, walking slowly and stooping often, picking up one starfish after another and tossing each one gently into the ocean.

“Why are you throwing starfish into the ocean?” he asks.

“Because the sun is up and the tide is going out and if I don’t throw them further in they will die.”

“But, old man, don’t you realize there are miles and miles of beach and starfish all along it! You can’t possibly save them all, you can’t even save one-tenth of them. In fact, even if you work all day, your efforts won’t make any difference at all.”

The old man listened calmly and then bent down to pick up another starfish and threw it into the sea. “It made a difference to that one.” 

Adapted from the story “The Star Thrower” by Loren Eiseley (1907 – 1977)

There is a great lesson available to us from this story. We may not be able to save the world. We may not even have the opportunity to convey our message to a large audience, though we know that others would greatly benefit from the knowledge and experience we could share. Our best opportunity to make a difference is to focus on those that are open to receiving our message and willing to accept our help. These are the people who are ready to listen and internalize our message.

There are many who would benefit from what we have learned through our successes and failures. Whether in our professional or personal lives we have a lot to offer others around us. In many ways as a leader we have a responsibility to develop those around us to allow them to better utilize their skills and ultimately help our team deliver success.

We are most effective when we concentrate on serving each person individually. If we concentrate on serving those who are receptive to our message, we may find that it leads to an opportunity to serve more people in the long run. Just as in the story, while we may not be able to reach the larger population, it may really make a difference to those we are able to reach. Taken one individual at a time over a long period of time, we will find we have made a difference to a large number of people.

I think about this story often. There is an enormous effort that goes into writing books, providing meaningful content in the blog, making videos, maintaining the website and corresponding with our community. There are times when it feels like I am shouting into the wind. Book sales come in one or two books at a time and the number of subscribers increases at a slow steady pace. Large audiences are not formed overnight or even sometimes at all. All of the hard work and long hours that go into writing the books does not automatically put the book in a wide circulation or place it on the Amazon or New York Times best seller list. I am reminded that overnight successes are years in the making.

It is the same when we consider the opportunities to mentor people and change the world around us. There are times when we will feel undervalued and it will be tempting to lose our enthusiasm. As leaders that is just the point where we need to apply our character and drive forward. One person at a time, one project at a time, one obstacle at a time. Over time our success will be measured by the individual successes we have along the way. In the end, we will know we have made a difference.

Here are 4 Tips for making a difference:

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Pay Attention

4 Tips for enhancing team engagement

Pay Attention 

“The secret to engaging our people is to pay attention.” — Skip Gilbert

Is our team truly engaged in their work? Do they see their efforts producing success in our organization or are they just putting in their time? Are they contributing with all of their creativity and energy or just doing what they are told? Do they believe we are headed in the right direction? Do they feel appreciated for their contributions? Do they have confidence in their leader? The success of our organization and leadership may be defined by how the members of our teams answer these questions.

Years of scientific research have provided compelling evidence that engaged employees perform better, are less likely to leave or burn out, and more likely to lead and embrace change. Employee engagement has also been found to correlate positively with business performance and other measures of organizational effectiveness. With the current pace of change, we are all in need of bringing forward the very best our resources have to offer and keeping the activity focused on meeting the current business need. Our best chance for continued success is with teams that are aligned and energized to make a difference.

With few exceptions, individuals want to contribute to and be part of something special, noble, good, and significant. They want to work for good people they respect and who also respect them. The individuals on our teams are human, and humans want a higher purpose in life. As individuals, we want to know that our work makes a difference, has value and that we are recognized for our contribution.

The key to improving overall engagement is to pay attention to the individual and their efforts. People need to be seen and managed as individuals and recognized for their individual performance. As leaders our additional responsibility is to help individuals achieve results as a group focused on the proper goals, while respecting each other as individuals. This is how we build high performance teams.

Vision and performance are the two key factors that drive core behaviors, that reinforce the basic need for recognition and meaning. Vision provides direction to ensure that we can align our efforts toward the corporate goal without having to be told what to do. Performance measures the results of our actions. Contributing to the resulting success reinforces feelings of self-worth and satisfaction that drive engagement. We can see that we are valued as individuals and that our efforts produce success. It takes both vision and performance to produce these results. Either one by itself does not yield the feelings of self-satisfaction that drive engagement.

Individuals who believe the company is headed in the right direction are also aligned around that direction. As they internalize the vision and join in the belief that it leads to a greater outcome, they are naturally drawn into focusing their actions to achieve those goals. The stronger the alignment to the vision, the more powerful the resulting performance will be. The entire organization will be pulling ahead to achieve a common goal. Without alignment in the right direction overall performance will be exponentially reduced as energies are expended in non-contributory efforts. Alignment is a significant factor in achieving the full capability of the organization.

A proven requirement for achieving a high level of engagement in our teams revolves around the team’s belief in our ability to lead. Each of the individuals on our team needs to believe that we are caring and capable leaders. We must demonstrate every day that we are reliable and consistent and share a deep interest in them as individuals and the overall objectives. Any wavering in our behavior will only diminish the strength of their belief.

Gallup has investigated whether leaders are more likely to engage employees by building close relationships and attending to their wellbeing, or simply focusing on their performance. Gallup’s findings suggest that the most effective leaders need to do both. One without the other does not produce the same results. We have to know where we are going and care about the people that are going to take us there to achieve the success we desire.

In the end it comes down to paying attention. Paying attention to the individual. Paying attention to their performance. It is far easier to achieve our goals with an engaged team of individuals than any other way. Smart leaders know this.

Here are 4 tips for enhancing team engagement:

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Make Yourself Valuable

It's about relationships

Make Yourself Valuable

Valuable

Everyday it seems there are headlines that jobs are being moved offshore, automated or eliminated. We do not have to look too far in our personal networks to find someone that has been impacted by this trend. Globalization is causing a shift in resource alignment as businesses search for lower costs and larger markets. In addition the United States economy continues to shift from a manufacturing economy to a service economy causing a continual restructuring of business resource needs.

With the trend of the commoditization of labor due to a larger global market and the reduced time employees are choosing to stay in their current positions, business is not investing as heavily in career development training as in the past. The Chicago Tribune reported on a study conducted by The Society for Human Resource Management (SHRM) that “virtually all professional and career benefits tracked in the survey declined between 2010 and 2014.”

The news is not all bad for those of us who pride ourselves on adaptability. As it turns out, many markets for domestic white-collar jobs are growing. Forbes reports “Over the past decade, business services has emerged as easily the largest high-wage sector in the United States, employing 19.1 million people. These are the white-collar jobs that most people believe offer a ladder into the middle class.”

Our challenge is to adapt to this new market. In the service business the relationship of business to its customers has never been more important or valuable than it is today. With the economy shifting to a service-based model and social media redefining the communications model, relationships have greater emphasis than ever before.

Relationships have always been the key to business. Going back as long as commerce has been around, relationships have driven the market. Whether it is the personal referral of a local contractor for home repairs or the corporate connection to other businesses, it is driven by relationships. Even in the age of online shopping, it is often the opinions expressed in the reviews of the buying community that impact the purchase decision.

So what can we do to ensure our marketability in this changing market?

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Let Go to Move Forward

Let Go to Move Forward

“Oh, yesterdays are over my shoulder, So I can’t look back for too long. There’s just too much to see waiting in front of me, and I know that I just can’t go wrong” — Jimmy Buffett

Recently, one of my readers posed an interesting question, ” …you have to let go of now before you can pickup something new, how do you free yourself to take the leap?” How many times have we hesitated on moving forward because we were afraid to take the next step? How often have we complained about our current situation and even had an idea for the solution or wanted to make a significant change, but sat on the sidelines because it was seemed more secure? I know I certainly have.

As I reflect on my personal hesitations, I often find that I was living with the false belief that my present situation was secure and that it was a risk to move forward. Over the years I have come to discover that security is really an illusion. There is no more certainty that tomorrow will be the same as today as there is likelihood that it will be different. We could be so fortunate as to win the lottery or inherit a great wealth or so unfortunate as to lose our health or employment.

To quote Helen Keller, “Security is mostly a superstition. It does not exist in nature, nor do the children of men as a whole experience it. Avoiding danger is no safer in the long run than outright exposure. Life is either a daring adventure, or nothing.”

So what do we do? How do we live with that reality and how do we let go of today to get to a better tomorrow? There are a couple of previous Blog posts we can take a look at that may offer us some guidance and structure.

In the Change Formula blog we discussed that our motivation for moving forward (change) was a product of our level of dissatisfaction with the current situation, a strong vision of the future, and practical next steps. The formula theorized that if all of these things were strong we would be motivated to move forward (change).

In the Be Bold blog we discussed that being bold to move forward was not an act of taking a foolish risk, but about putting together a well thought out plan, being confident in our abilities, gaining the knowledge needed and then taking action. In other words moving from careless risk to prudent risk with a high likelihood of success.

So what can we do? Let’s take a look at the issue we are hesitating about and figure out how to move forward.

Here are some practical steps:

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Be Bold

Be Bold

Go ahead, you can do it. Be Bold, take the next step. Take a chance and try it or better yet do it. Sometimes these words are easier said than done. It is advice we hear all of the time and yet it is so hard to do. Why is that and what can we do?

Our hesitation to step forward stems from fear, mostly fear of failure and it is called Atychiphobia. Phobia Source defines Atychiphobia as “a persistent, abnormal, and unwarranted worry of failure.” While for some people this could be a serious disorder, for most of us it is just a nagging insecurity (but at least it has a name!).

Sometimes it just feels easier to play it safe or stay in the background and let things happen, even when we know we have a better solution. Interestingly enough, Hellen Keller is quoted as saying “Avoiding danger is no safer in the long run than outright exposure. The fearful are caught as often as the bold.”

Being Bold is not about being a hero. You may end up being a hero, but that is an outcome not a motivation. Being Bold is about taking a prudent risk and moving forward. In fact we should not risk everything or be foolish, but after due thought and consideration take the next step and move forward.

After all what is the alternative? If we are timid and do not move forward we are going to suffer the consequences of inaction. It is better to move forward and and learn, even if our action does not succeed than to hide in the corner and watch things unfold. It is more likely that our effort will succeed than fail anyway.

For me, I have to occasionally remind myself that If I am going to lose sleep over something it is better to lose sleep over having taken action than worrying about what might happen. Better to take action than be a victim. After all, worrying and complaining does not change anything. Put that energy into change.

Often times what keeps us from Being Bold or taking action is fear of how others will judge us. But in reality, we need to recognize that there will always be skeptics and spectators that have an opinion, but they were not bold enough to take action. Ignore their criticisms, after all they did not risk anything or enact a better solution.

Here is an interesting comparison of terms. Which are likely to produce better results? Being adventurous, audacious, courageous, daring, or being afraid, cautious, cowardly, or fearful?

So how can we go about Being Bold? Here are six steps to help us along the way: